By Antoinette Chew, Ministry Pastor of COTHA Kids
He loves me, He love me not?
There is no hiding that I have been going through some trials in my life lately. Sometimes I feel like nobody loves me, not even God. I am the type of person that when things are going well, my relationships really thrive, but when things begin to fall apart in my life, I shut down and my relationships seem to stop growing. My introverted side really takes over and I feel like I have to deal with problems by myself. I made my mess, so I have to clean it up.
Growing up in a very full house with eight siblings was always loud, always total chaos, fun and exciting, but also very lonely. I always had someone to play with, but not always someone to listen. Don’t get me wrong, my family life was good, but it lacked attention and direction. I guess that is why I always try to be “perfect”. When I was “perfect” I would get recognition and love from my family but when I was less than perfect, which by the way happened more often than not, I would receive nothing. Just loneliness and rejection
I have always thought I could just hide my inabilities and present my best self to God and to others. Perhaps if I was perfect, then He and others would love me—really love me! But the truth is I will never be perfect. I could work my whole life for perfection, but it will never achieve it. But I don’t need to earn anything; indeed, I cannot earn any forgiveness, honor or love on my own. Christ’s life, death and resurrection earned it all. I may rest easily, for the only one who really knows me thoroughly happens to be my Father in Heaven. And yes, he loves me and his love is all that matters.
HE LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!
He loves me, He love me not?
There is no hiding that I have been going through some trials in my life lately. Sometimes I feel like nobody loves me, not even God. I am the type of person that when things are going well, my relationships really thrive, but when things begin to fall apart in my life, I shut down and my relationships seem to stop growing. My introverted side really takes over and I feel like I have to deal with problems by myself. I made my mess, so I have to clean it up.
Growing up in a very full house with eight siblings was always loud, always total chaos, fun and exciting, but also very lonely. I always had someone to play with, but not always someone to listen. Don’t get me wrong, my family life was good, but it lacked attention and direction. I guess that is why I always try to be “perfect”. When I was “perfect” I would get recognition and love from my family but when I was less than perfect, which by the way happened more often than not, I would receive nothing. Just loneliness and rejection
I have always thought I could just hide my inabilities and present my best self to God and to others. Perhaps if I was perfect, then He and others would love me—really love me! But the truth is I will never be perfect. I could work my whole life for perfection, but it will never achieve it. But I don’t need to earn anything; indeed, I cannot earn any forgiveness, honor or love on my own. Christ’s life, death and resurrection earned it all. I may rest easily, for the only one who really knows me thoroughly happens to be my Father in Heaven. And yes, he loves me and his love is all that matters.
HE LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!
RSS Feed